As Promised

I told you all that I would give you an update on how the appointment with the surgeon went yesterday, sorry I didn't do it sooner like I said I would.  Things went really well! The surgeon was really nice and seemed to really know his stuff (very important if you are going to cut on me, LOL, even with just lasers).  He is going to do a endoscopy on me and look at my gallbladder to make sure there are no problems, already got that scheduled.  I also have to schedule a psych evaluation, which is standard for weight loss surgery, but if you don't hear from me after that for awhile you know they called the men in white coats to take me away! Hehehe.  Once all of that is done, we wait for my insurance to approve it and the surgeon feels certain they will.  So, it's not happening next week or anything but chances are it will happen soon!

Sitting there in the waiting room after meeting the surgeon, waiting for paperwork and future appointments to be scheduled, I felt excited and hopeful for the first time in awhile.  There was a lady there who had her three month old son with her and I suddenly started thinking that it may not be too late for me to have a family of my own in the not too distant future after all! I am not all dried up yet! Maybe when I look good I will find some man who will love me.  I always said that I would never lose weight just for a man, I figured that any man who required it would never be worth the effort and any man worth the effort would never require it! I realize now that I may have grossly overestimated men! :) I may not be a supermodel, but I still deserve to be loved and respected for who I am as a person.  And who that person is and is becoming is worth the effort to know and love and yes, sometimes, even put up with.  I used to feel that I had so much inside of me to give to the right person but would never be able to give it and that made me feel sad and angry.  I KNOW I am capable of unconditional love, support, faithfulness, caring and everything else relationships require.  Maybe I will get the chance to prove it one day.

Regardless, my main reason for going through with the surgery is for ME! I want to be healthy and able to enjoy all life has to offer!